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Daily Bull 04.11.16 - Sick Burn, Bro

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Every other day, every other day of the week is fine, yeah
But whenever Monday comes you can find me cryin' all of the time

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Jeff J Mitchell/Getty Images

MORE LIKE BATMAN VS. SUPERBRAND We got another visit from our old friend Chet Norsworth this weekend. Looks like the marketing wizard has a new, weird plan to separate mindless Aggies from their money (I have 3 of these.)

MAYBE A LITTLE SLIVER-EY AFTER ALL The Nielsen group released their ratings for college football for 2015 and provided this handy graphic of college football fans by county.

little sliver

Hard to make out Brazos county there, but it sure seems like it might be grey. Probably because Aggies are actual real fans and go to the games rather than watching them or literally any other game on television. That is definitely it.

WAKE AND TAKE The Bullcasters decided to record on a Saturday morning rather than the usual post-work, late-night Thursday beat down and the results were decidedly less misanthropic. Tune in and hear our frighteningly accurate Maroon & White game predictions that were recorded 6 hours before kickoff.

THIS IS A MERCY KILLING, REALLY it would have been cruel to force the Longhorns to watch someone else actually get a bowl bid and then a win in DKR. Tell me that ESiPN isn't trying to protect their LHN interests, buddy!

THESE REALITY SHOW PREMISES ARE GETTING RIDICULOUS Like a single firework the rumor that Johnny Manziel was moving in with Von Miller in LA was too beautiful to last. I think they would have started off as complete opposites who hated each other, only to find common ground by working through some adversity and realizing they weren't so different after all. Then they would have become the best of friends right before their theme song (Why Can't We Be Friends as covered by Smash Mouth) started playing and the credits rolled.

10.0 FOR EXECUTION THOUGH What this young man failed to realize until it was too late is that Texas prints all of their admissions letters on cyanide-infused paper. From hell's dark heart Greg Fenves stabs at thee! (also, he found this really quirky boutique on east 6th that does all of their artisanal paper infusing by hand, it's really cool we should go sometime!)