Last week saw some mild surprises unfold, and also some mild non-surprises. Basically it was all very mild:
- Doug: Tech kicked Arkansas' ass 35-24.
- thacktor: SMU and TCU was reasonably close...for a while...final 56-37
- Chuck: Florida crushed Kentucky's dreams of ending the dry spell in a 14-9 SEC East thriller
- Dr. Norris Camacho: Iowa beat Pitt on a 57-yard field goal after Pitt's coached called timeout to ice the kicker
Last week's winner was...I guess me because we all can agree that icing is some of the dumbest shit imaginable and yet it won't go away why won't it ever go away oh my god
Anyway, that's the past. We have a brand-new addition this week to the group, so please welcome prominent GBHer Shooter Flatch. Shooter is a longtime commenter and a pretty dang good Fan Poster so check out his stuff when you get a chance.
Dr. Norris Camacho
#21 Stanford at Oregon State, Friday 9:00 PM FS1
BYU @ Michigan
11:00 am Saturday, ABC
This isn’t your normal 11:00 am B1G Dutch Oven Special. This is the rare mixture of a really good chance for an exciting start to the day, combined with a large helping of wild ass crazy. On the football side of things, BYU’s games so far this year have been nothing short of heart stopping. They ended their first two games with game-clinching Hail Mary passes. And last week they went on the road to a top 10 UCLA team, and only lost by one point in the final three minutes of the game. On the other side you have a stout Michigan defense, but an offense that face plants every time the training wheels come off. This game will likely be decided in the final 5 minutes of the game.
Now you get to add in the completely "wild ass" factor for both teams. BYU has become notorious lately for it’s dirty play and it’s extracurricular activities on the field. Let’s face it, BYU has turned into the Cobra Kai of college football and Bronco Mendenhall is the asshole sensei Kreese.
But luckily for viewers, the crazy doesn’t end there. On the opposite sideline, you have Jim Harbaugh. We’re not talking "go for it on 4th and 5" type crazy either. Harbaugh is more like "there’s a dead body in the trunk of my car" type crazy. At Stanford he had his postgame handshake confrontation with Pete Carroll. And in the NFL, he had an even crazier postgame mixup with The Schwartz. We could have a last minute score to win, fistfights, cheap shots, and two coaches going at it shirtless on the 50 yard line postgame.
So tune in for the dramatic football sure to unfold Saturday morning, and then stick around afterward to see if Jim Harbaugh bites a piece of Sensei Mendenhall’s ear off a la Tyson/Holyfield.
TCU at Texas Tech | 3:45 PM | FOX
REMINDER: the final score of the 2014 matchup between these teams in Fort Worth was 82-27 Frogs. Eighty two. The last time someone from Lubbock took a beating like that oil was $40 a barrel and Barbara Sue was having to get back to earth’s oldest industry to shake out a couple nickels from a roughneck. That was Monday of this week. Now, the tables have turned a little bit. Ol sneaky CPA Patterson is having to assemble a piecemeal a team because his entire roster is either injured or suspended. Do you know what has to happen to get suspended at either Baylor or TCU? Someone has to die. I haven’t seen such selective grace since a televangelist preached the fire and brimstone of sodomy and was found with a Laotian ladyboy in a west Texas motel. But I digress, folks.
Meanwhile, Kliff got his swagger back by outfoxing the high school bully lardass. Beating the worst team in the SEC West is the best non-conference victory in Texas Tech history. I kind of like Tech in this matchup. They ARE smarter, believe it or not. Raiders have TCU GPAs but the common sense not to drop $60k per year on a degree in Fort Worth Home Ec.
Colorado State @ UT San Antonio
Saturday 6 PM, CBSSN
This is a matchup of two of my favorite entry-level football teams and will be on my go-back button during AgHawg '15.
On the one hand you have Mike Bobo, erstwhile Georgia offensive coordinator and the latest SEC assistant coach to take charge of the Rams after Jim McElwain's departure for the Florida gig. After starting the season by head-butting Savanna State into submission, Bob has lost back-to-back OT thrillers to P5 teams. Don't let the record fool you, this is a decent CSU team.
Meanwhile, Larry Coker is down in San Antonio cokering up the situation there. "Cokering", for those unfamiliar with the term, is where you attach yourself to a team and slowly feed while doing irreparable harm to the structure. Larry Coker is a barnacle, and the submerged hulk of the Miami Hurricane football team is a living testament to the damage that he can do when he stays long enough to rupture a team's hull. He inherited the 2001 Miami Hurricanes - arguably one of the greatest football teams of all time - won a national championship, and then steadily replaced that amazing roster with his own recruits until they were just a shell of their former selves. Now he's at UTSA where he started with a 2nd place finish in C-USA West and now are still seeking their first win of the season.
CSU is favored by a ten-spot, but I still have faith that this will end in OT ridiculousness. Rams. Roadrunners. Get some college football.
Arkansas State at Toledo