We know: you don't care about Texas. You'e moved on. Boy, how you've moved on. You've embraced the SEC whole-heartedly. You have a Clay Travis bumper sticker and secretly harbor neutral-gender feelings towards pom-poms. You chant S-E-C when you finish that last swath of grass off with the lawnmower. You remind EVERYONE how the Ags don't need to play the Longhorns anymore and you're OVER IT.
You're so over it that you ostentatiously plan elaborate excursions around your Thanksgiving holiday to show that it's no big deal that that so-called rivalry isn't part of it anymore. There was that first year that you went to Lake Havasu for a nice long weekend of golf with a few of your closest pals. Then there was last year's deep-sea fishing jaunt to Port Mansfield where Phil almost fell overboard hooking that Kingfish (Phil, smh). This year is the best yet: you're getting away to the Caribbean. Erase those gray November days with some Nassau white sands and sapphire waters and not even worry about those pretentious, arrogant elitists in Austin and--
The Aggies will play the Longhorns on November 25. In basketball, in The Bahamas.
Oh. Escape is not an option. The rooms are booked, so are the flights, and everyone's looking forward to it already with school about to start. You're stuck. You will have to adapt. Endure it. After all, it could be worse: they could be playing each other in football.