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Ole Miss Playlist: A History of Failing Upward

You want to stumble into success, head to Ole Miss

Why hello. Looks like we have a the makings of quite an interesting final stretch to this football season. All of you were on here bitching about this team just a few weeks ago. Soft as baby shit Ags. While I had my doubts, and feelings about the team I don’t vocalize them on Twitter or SpaceHey. Yeah that’s right a throwback social media site like MySpace is back, baby!

Night game, in the grove, ESPN carting out a senile octogenarian onto a national broadcast, this is a perfect recipe for Ole Miss. Take a look at the coaching history of the Rebs, are the still the Rebels? Sharks? Squid-men?

Before I go through some recent coaches can we please pause and look at the early head coaches of Ole Miss football. If you wanted to make a civil war baby name list, start here:

Alexander Bondurant, Charles Dow Clark, H. L. Fairbanks, John W. Hollister, T. G. Scarbrough, W. H. Lyon and Z. N. Estes. All of those coaches, coached for one year. I assume because they all died of cholera or tuberculosis.

Also they combined for a hefty 14-13 in seven years, and they kept the damn program! Failing upwards started from the beginning at Ole Miss.

Now, let’s get to some more recent coaches. Tommy Tuberville, sorry Senator Tuberville (my hands almost melted typing that.) Said he would be carried at of Oxford in a pine box one week he packed his shit and left for Auburn. Thomas was a respectable 25-20 at Ole Miss. He then went on to me one of the most successful coaches in Auburn history.

Next up, David Cutcliffe. While going 44-29 in Oxford was great, getting fired for not taking a look at your assistants poor performance is pretty hilarious. He has gone on to be the 3rd most winning coach in Duke history.

Who did Ole Miss hire next, THE CAJUN COOKIE MONSTER!

Ed O went a hilarious 10- 25 as a coach in Oxford and he made a cameo in The Blindside. He then went on to win a Natty at LSU.

Then came Houston Nutt, Hugh Freeze and Matt Luke. I’ll let you look them up.

And finally, king ding-a-ling himself, Joey Freshwater. Here’s a hell of a resume: USC assistant, to somehow head coach of the Oakland Raiders, head coach a Tennessee, head coach at USC (fired on the tarmac), HC to FAU and now wearing bowties in Oxford. This guy, has platinum horseshoe shoved all the way up his ass. I hope we beat the brakes off them.

Seriously. What. The. Fuck.

It’s gonna be a wild time out in Lafayette County Saturday night. These are the types of games that get us all antsy in the pantsy, and make @string change his shirt about 37 times.

Everyone be safe, have fun and BTHO ole miss. (If anyone catches my joke with some of the titles and numbering on this playlist post in the comments. I will send you a high five, not a real one, gross.)