TOP CHEF: RECAP ALL CAPS

BRO WHAT A DAMN EPISODE. WE STARTED OFF WITH A MFING MIS EN PLACE RELAY. LIKE RIGHT OFF THE BAT THEY’RE GONNA HIT US WITH THE MONSTER TRUCK RALLY OF ALL TOP CHEF CHALLENGES. THESE RELAYS ARE INSANE...AND SURE WE ALL KNOW HOW TOUGH IT IS TO BREAK DOWN AN ANIMAL OR CLEAN AN ARTICHOKE BUT THEN THEY HAD FOLKS CRACKING ALMONDS? BRO. RIGHT OFF THE BAT THIS THING HIT US WITH THE GOOD STUFF.

LOVED THE ELIMINATION CHALLENGE TOO. LET’S COOK OVER A GD OPEN FLAME. IF YOU AINT READY YOU BETTER GET READY. MELISSA THREW A WHOLE ASS RADICCHIO INTO THE OPEN FLAMES. AND TOM FREAKING LOVED IT. THEN JAMIE LITERALLY THREW HOT COALS INTO HIS DISH TO ADD SOME SMOKEY FLAVOR AND FOLKS LOVED IT. WE TAKING BIG CHANGES THIS YEAR. AND THEN GREGORY TAKING THE DAMN TROPHY WITH CHARRED SALMON/GRILLED PEACHES/CHILI SAUCE?

WE GOT A NUMBER OF FOLKS, JOEY, VOLTAGGIO, STEPHANIE WHO FINISHED SECOND IN THEIR SEASON THIS YEAR AND THEY’RE LOOKING TO KICK SOME ASS. I LOVE THIS SHOW SO MUCH.

RIP JOEY SASTO AKA JOEY PASTA. MAN HOW ON EARTH ARE YOU GONNA THINK THAT MAKING A DAMN PASTA IN A QUICK FIRE CHALLENGE IS A GOOD IDEA? YOU KNOW YOUR PASTA DOESNT HAVE TIME TO REST?! AND THEN YOU GO WITH A SOGGY ASS FLATBREAD FOR THE ELIMINATION CHALLENGE? I EXPECTED MORE OUT OF YOU JOEY. I EXPECTED MORE.

AND DONT GET ME STARTED ON LEANN. HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW THAT PUTTING OIL ON A PIECE OF FISH CURRENTLY ON THE GRILL WOULD END UP WITH FLAMES? HOW DID YOU NOT KNOW THAT? DISAPPOINTING LEANN. DISAPPOINTING.

AND LAST—-THE FREAKING NEXT CHALLENGE STARTED RIGHT AS THE FIRST ONE ENDED. THIS SEASON IS GONNA BE A COCAINE FUELED ROLLER COASTER RIDE. PADMA TODD AND GAIL ARENT PLAYING.

POWER RANKINGS:

BOTTOM 5

15) JOEY PASTA

14) LEE ANNE

13) ANGELO

12) KEVIN-SO DISAPPOINTED IN YOU BRO

11) ERIC A-ALSO V DISAPPOINTED IN YOU

TOP 5

5) STEPH C.

4) VOLT

3) JEN

2) MELISSA

1) GREGORY

AND ON A MORE SERIOUS NOTE. ID LIKE TO EXPRESS MY SINCEREST CONDOLENCES ON THE PASSING OF CHEF FLOYD CARDOZ FROM COVID 19 RELATED COMPLICATIONS. CHEF CARDOZ WON TOP CHEF MASTERS BY COOKING INDIAN FOOD, WHICH A TOTAL MIND F FOR ME. HE COOKED FOOD THAT I GREW UP EATING, MOREOVER HE WON BY COOKING A DISH THAT MY MOM COOKS EVERY SINGLE WEEKEND THAT I GREW UP DISLIKING (MAINLY BECAUSE WE ATE IT SO OFTEN) BUT NOW I RELISH BECAUSE IT’S MFING COMFORT FOOD. I SAW MY FAMILY IN HIS COOKING, AND IT MEANT SOMETHING. HE MADE WHAT WAS TOTALLY ORDINARY TO ME SOUND FANCY...AND ITS WEIRD TO SEE THINGS THAT YOU GREW UP AND STRUGGLED WITH (BECAUSE IT WAS DIFFERENT AND MADE YOU AN OUTSIDER) NOW CELEBRATED. THAT’S CRAZY.

ABOUT A YEAR AGO ANOTHER TOP CHEF CONTESTANT, CHEF FATIMA ALI, PASSED AWAY OF CANCER. MUCH LIKE CHEF CARDOZ SHE COOKED SOUTH ASIAN FOOD (MOSTLY PAKISTANI)...BUT IT WAS ALL STUFF THAT I KNEW. STUFF I RECOGNIZED AND STUFF THAT I ATE AT HOME OR IN RESTAURANTS WITH MY PARENTS. AND BOTH OF THOSE BROKE MY HEART BECAUSE FOOD IS A PART OF CULTURE. FOOD IS A COMMONALITY. AND I COULD GLEAN HOW CHEF ALI AND CHEF CARDOZ GREW UP BECAUSE THEIR DEFINITION OF COMFORT FOOD WAS THE SAME AS MINE. I DIDNT KNOW THEM BUT I KNEW THEM.

RIP CHEF CARDOZ. THANK YOU FOR MAKING KICK ASS INDIAN FOOD AND THANK YOU FOR MAKIGN INDIAN FOOD KICK ASS.