Let’s all take a breath and go back to our childhood for a moment and a lovely song some may remember from an Apple commercial. Thanks Feist!
No reason, just thought it would be a friendly reminder...
Now where are we? We are good this year! Or at least as good as any team not named Alabama, Clemson and Ohio State. And that’s the most Aggie compliment I have ever typed. But now we play our long hated rival from the Sandhills, those fighting Gamecocks.
Everyone else has covered Columbia and the roosters, so let me talk about the real gem the Palmetto state has given us. And that, dear reader, is the reality show Southern Charm. Oh, are you not familiar with this masterpiece of American television? Well, this award worthy show is about a group of rich whites, as Dave Chapelle would call them. That’s about it. The women are pretty catty and the men are all just a group of man-children.
The one in the middle, Craig, is the most successful, by far. He has a law degree, but does he use it? Hell naw! He is following his passion and has opened a semi-successful pillow business. Check out his sixty dollar pillows!
And the ladies, oh man the ladies. First off is the matriarch of the city of Charleston, I am guessing, Patricia. Pretty much any scene she is in, is just rubbing it in the face of the viewer by showing how obscenely wealthy she is. She has a live in butler, his name is Michael and I bet he makes a hell of julep.
Then there are the younger ladies. Cameran, who is no longer on the show, but she was on the Real World San Diego, over 15 years ago! That’s like 575 in reality tv years.
Then there a bunch that all looks similar and have names like Landon, Madison, Eliza and Whitney. Oh shit, Whitney is Patricia’s son, my bad.
And finally there is Kathryn Calhoun. She has gone through some changes since the show started.
Ummmmm... aside from that up there, she dated Thomas Ravenel who is the son of a former congressman. Thomas was state treasurer for six months, until he was convicted FEDERAL COCAINE CHARGES! Have I told you this is the greatest show of all time?
So those two psychos have two kids, Thomas just had a third kid, they both went to rehab in the past 2 years and Thomas has two sexual assault charges, one from his ex girlfriend’s mother, that he settled out of court. #chefskiss
I hope everyone has a great gameday. Take your vitamins, say your prayers, have fun, be safe and BTHO south carolina!
Fun week of listening to some new stuff from Meghan the Stallion, Touché Amoré and Kylie Minogue who can still get it. And a few proud South Carolinian bands: Band of Horse, Toro y Moi, Jeezy, Maurice Williams and the patron saint of South Carolina Hootie and the Blowfish team up with Major Lazer. Yup 2020, it all checks out.