Yee-Haw! Jimbo Fisher gets $150k bonus for football team’s academic performance

[GIANT CASH REGISTER SOUNDS]

CH-CHINGGG

More great news for Aggie head coach Jimbo Fisher this week, as the Dallas Morning News is reporting that he’ll scoop up a tidy six-figure sum based on the academic performance of his football players. Surely this is great inspiration to the players who sacrifice their time and bodies at the altar of amateur sports. To see their head coach rewarded with roughly a week’s pay has to make them feel proud.

Per the article:

According to the terms of Fisher’s contract with the Aggies, Fisher receives the six-figure bonus if the team’s APR is 965 or higher. In the NCAA’s latest report, A&M had an APR of 967 for the 2017-18 academic year and rolling four-year period. The figure ranked in the 50th to 60th percentile for all NCAA football programs and is higher than the APR of 965 for the previous school year.

Great work, Coach! All those late-night personal tutoring sessions have certainly paid off.

So how is Jimbo gonna blow this lovely windfall? Here are a few ideas:

• another cow
• 2-3 Pelotons (depending on features)
• 20 executive suites at the Pitcock for an October weekend
• a few family paks of Aggie Dogs
• a few semesters of tuition
• 50 tables at Houston Coach’s Night
• three-four months’ stay in a Cottage at Traditions
• about 43,000 Texas Survival Kits at Duddley’s Draw for the rest of us unwashed masses

What else? Let us know in the comments how Jimbo’s gonna spend this happy cash.