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Fan Misery Ladder 19.8: We Are The Aggies The Aggies Are We

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papa was an immutable stone

COLLEGE FOOTBALL: OCT 28 Mississippi State at Texas A&M Photo by Ken Murray/Icon Sportswire via Getty Images

Welcome back to the Fan Misery Ladder, where Kansas always makes us sad.

Normally I start these posts with a deep dive into the most visceral misery of the week, but today we’re doing something a little different. We are going to talk about my beloved Aggies, to whom nothing technically bad happened this weekend. In fact, by the most generous definition of the word, this was a good weekend. Yes, nothing of particular note befell the intrepid 12th Man.

It is precisely the fact that nothing happened that makes Texas A&M the team of the week. As of week 8 of the season, the Aggies are the only team left in the FML that has yet to move up or down a tier. We are a mighty bulwark of low-level depression, a monument to taking our lumps in stride. For the 12th Man this season is ambivalence as performance art. Ol’ Rock the Good Ag is a granite slab jutting out of the churning chaos of college football around it. It’s like ennui put on pads and is waiting in the stands for coach if he needs it.

Last year the Army Black Knights put on a similar display of resigned determination before launching into a season ending hot streak. It’s probably not gonna go the same way this time. Stiff upper lip, chaps.

Let’s take a look at the big board:

If you are unfamiliar with the rules you can find them here and here.

MISERY OF NOTE

REQUIEM FOR A TEAM That thud you heard emanating from Tuscaloosa on Saturday was Volunteer fans crashing in a heap in what will likely be their final 2019 resting place. Many beat journos now have Tennessee as the front-runner for the Taggart this season. It will be a shocker if the judges deny the Scarlet Knights for a second year in a row, but the grim tale being spun in Neyland this season could have been directed by Aronofsky.

YOU’D EXPECT COLORADANS TO BE HIGHER Like that first strong breeze that announces the coming storm, the Buffaloes have begun their patented plummet from peak to valley. Wazzu handed Colorado their whole ass, and now the two meet briefly on the Fourth Tier heading in very different directions. Good news! Weed is fun if you’re happy or sad (spoiler: everyone is sad).

WE’LL DIG OUR WAY OUT No post this season would be complete without a tip of the hat to Rutgers, who arrived in the Ninth Tier last week and continues to claw at the bedrock in search of a sub basement. New Jersey could not form a more perfect football program.

LOOKING AHEAD

  • With a win over Miami this weekend Pitt could find themselves in the First Tier because this is 2019 and up is down left is spaghetti.
  • Kansas proved that they are not actually good but are perfectly capable of cherry-bombing someone’s season at any time. Both they and Texas Tech are on the verge of loss-streak completion, so no matter what Lawrence will make people sadder.
  • Rutgers is playing Liberty this weekend. That the rules of the FML offer no recourse for Rutgers to leave the Ninth Tier no matter the outcome of the game is sublime.

FML 19.7: Commodore Days and Scarlet Knights
FML 19.6: Shell Shock Jayhawk
FML 19.5: Ramblin’ Wrecks
FML 19.4: Not All Tears Are Blood
FML 19.3: This Means Something
FML 19.2: The PAC Delivers
FML 19.1: Rocky Bottom
FML 19.0: Preseason