ALL CAPS PREVIEW: TEXAS A&M AT ALABAMA

THIS IS THE BEST MOST FUN GAME OF THE YEAR.

THIS GAME RIGHT HERE. 2:30 ON CBS AT ALABAMA AGAINST SABANS CHAINSAW WIELDING GROUP OF DEMENTORS IS THE REASON WE GOT INTO THIS CONFERENCE.

THIS GAME RIGHT HERE, WHERE WE’RE LED BY A STEELY EYED MISSILE MAN OF A QB COACHED BY A GUY WHO’S HOISTED TROPHIES AT MULTIPLE SCHOOLS IS THE REASON WE LOVE THIS STUPID GAME OF FOOTBALL.

THIS GAME. THIS IS THE GAME.

THIS TEAM AINT SCARED. NOTHING IS MORE FREEING THAN THE LACK OF EXPECTATIONS. NOTHING IS MORE FUN THAN PLAYING BECAUSE YOU LOVE THE SPORT. NOT CARING ABOUT LOSING AND JUST WANTING TO WIN. KNOWING THAT YOU CAN WIN. BELIEVING THAT YOU WILL WIN. AND FRIENDS, WE’RE GONNA WIN THIS GODDAMN GAME.

YOU KNOW WHAT. THAT TEAM BLEEDS JUST LIKE US. THEY SWEAT JUST LIKE US. THERE AINT NO DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THEM AND US. EVERYONE’S SAYING THAT WE’LL GET HIT IN THE MOUTH AND STUMBLE, BUT GUESS WHAT. THEY’RE JUST LIKE US. IF WE HIT THEM IN THE MOUTH FIRST THEY’LL STUMBLE TOO. AND THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT WE’RE GONNA DO TO EM AGS. WE’RE GONNA GO OUT THERE AND HIT THEM SQUARE IN THE GD MOUTH.

SO TO HELL WITH ALL THIS HUMILITY ABOUT JUST WANTING TO COVER. TO HELL WITH THIS DEFERENCE TO THE SUPPOSED ROYALTY OF COLLEGE FOOTBALL. EVEN A KING CAN BLEED.

I AINT SKEERED. AND YOU SHOULDNT BE EITHER.

FOR YEARS WE HAD A SWAGGER FIELD TEAM BASED ON SMOKE AND MIRRORS. NOW WE HAVE A SWAGGER FILLED TEAM BASED ON PREPARATION. WE DONT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT RISING TO THE CHALLENGE. WE’RE FOCUSED ON REVERTING BACK TO OUR PREPARATION AND OUR TRAINING. AND FOLKS, WE’RE PREPARED.

THIS TEAM IS READY.

THIS COACH IS READY.

THAT QB IS READY.

ARE YOU READY?

BECAUSE YOU DAMN WELL BETTER BE.

WE’RE GONNA GET THIS WIN. IT’S GONNA HAPPEN.

BEAT

THE

EVERLIVING

EVERLOVING

COMPOUND

COMPLEX

FIGHTIN TEXAS AGGIE HIT EM IN THE GD MOUTH

FIGHTIN TEXAS AGGIE KNUCK IF YOU BUCK

FIGHTIN TEXAS AGGIE WE’RE ALL GETTING TATTOOS WHEN WE WIN

FIGHTIN TEXAS AGGIE HELL OUTTA bama