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Daily Bull 3.5.18: Monday Madness

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Let’s kick this week off in style

Texas A&M v Kansas Photo by Jamie Squire/Getty Images

GOOD MORNING AGGIE INTERNET. How about that basketball game, eh? Guess they call it March Madness because the basketball begins to display the turmoil-inducing lunacy of an 18th century sanatorium patient claiming he can speak with the archangel Zach Morris and paint watercolors with his earlobe. No? Just us? Okay. Just a quick run through the high points from the weekend:

HOOP DREAMZ. The Ag bouncycourters managed to tie their shoelaces in multiple knots, cartwheel rambunctiously across the court haphazardly, and fail to keep their hands to themselves in the final minute (read: hour of real time) of the season finale against Bama. But they won somehow to eke out the .500 conference record and secure an 8 seed in the #SECBasketballFever tourney where they will face [checks card]...Alabama. Great. Tipoff is Thursday at 1 p.m., so this sucker should still be on TV when you get home from work.

COACHES, ASSEMBLE! Jimbo Fisher continues to artfully manufacture his super coaching staff Voltron with the addition of TCU’s director of player personnel Eric Russell. His exact title at A&M is unknown. “We don’t know what we want him for, we just know we want him,” Jimbo Fisher may or may not have said, but probably not, at least not out loud, before mailing Russell a box full of hundred dollar bills. Russell served as a longtime assistant under A&M OC Darrell Dickey when he was the North Texas head coach. Texas A&M’s coaching staff payroll is now roughly the equal to the GDP of a small Mediterranean nation. Just the way Bear Bryant drew it up in the dust out in Junction.

FRISCO KIDS. The Ag Beisbollers took 2 of 3 on the weekend up in America’s Shiniest Suburban Playground. They dropped Friday’s opener to Louisiana Tech before bouncing back and taking down Baylor and Cal on Saturday and Sunday. Hoo boy, the last time we saw those three teams on the schedule in the same year you had to pay $1200 for insider info and option football was alive and well in College Station. Well, it was alive anyway, if just barely. Northwestern State comes to town tomorrow for a pair of midweek games.

Have a fun Monday, gang. Let’s rip on some bad food social media.

Poll

Which portion of this "meal" offends you the most?

This poll is closed

  • 4%
    The dark beer: BBQ is to be eaten with light beer, Big Red, Dr. Pepper, or iced tea sweetened to the point where the spoon stands up on its own
    (17 votes)
  • 5%
    The two entire pickles: cheap, thinly-sliced dill hamburger chips are the only acceptable pickle sides when eating BBQ
    (22 votes)
  • 17%
    The two "rolls": these look like they came from the bottom stack of a huge pallet in your middle school cafeteria. You can practically taste the cellophane just by looking at them.
    (67 votes)
  • 72%
    The actual meat: this brisket is uniform in color throughout and appears to have been boiled for days with no seasoning whatsoever.
    (285 votes)
391 votes total Vote Now