What’s the best part of Bowl Season? You guessed it: the arrival of hastily-conceived and mass-produced bowl memorabilia. To wit:
The new @adidas Gator Bowl shirts just came in!! Not a bad stocking stuffer idea @taxslayerbowl— Maroon U (@MaroonU) December 10, 2018
: https://t.co/RtZpoPtjmQ pic.twitter.com/mZVSbYbUu3
Yessir, we too are here to create. Create a roast of these mysterious articles of emptiness.
- hobby lobby craft novice ass shirt
- It’s A Bowl Game
- Here To Create: 5,000 Words About A Tweet
- Here To Create: 5,000 Tweets About Nothing
- (the back is blank)
- Internet, find anagrams
- More meaningful than recruiting rankings-ass t-shirt-ass
- Jacksonville thinks this shirt is sprawling and bland
- When you accidentally copy & paste from the instructions “click here to create another bland Aggie t-shirt”
- Inspired by one of Patton’s lesser-known quotes: “Give me a bowl game in Jacksonville and I’ll make one creative-ass t-shirt, motherfuckers.”
- You know you are proud of your bowl game when its logo takes up 2% of the shirt’s printed area
- Available in youth and adult sizes, so you know where to donate it next year.
- (Goodwill doesn’t want this t-shirt, asshole)
- buy now to write off on your 2018 tax losses
- (are you even listening to us?)
- How to convert leftover fish camp shirts into Christmas sales
- Here to create New Years Eve regret that does not involve alcohol
- Here to create memories on an episode of COPS before ripping my shirt off because by law, all males must be shirtless at the end of a COPS episode
- Here to create rules to follow in the name of freedom
- Because “I Came Here To Do Two Things: Play A Second-Tier ACC School In A Drab Floridian Suburbscape, and Create. And It Looks Like We’re All Out Of Second-Tier ACC Schools In Drab Floridian Suburbscapes” wouldn’t fit on the damn t-shirt.
These cost $35 each. That’s the joke.