ALL CAPS PREVIEW: AUBURN

THIS IS OUR GAME

THIS IS OUR TIME

THIS IS OUR TURN

NO SERIOUSLY IT’S OUR TURN. TAKE A LOOK AT THE SERIES AGAINST AUBURN.

2012: BIG WIN OVER BRIAN VANGORDER WHO SOMEHOW GOT OTHER JOBS

2013: HORSECOLLAR

2014: IN WHAT WAS THE BEST WEEK EVER, TOO MANY COOKS CAME OUT AND THEN WE WENT ON THE ROAD TO BEAT AUBURN. AWESOME.

2015: I BARELY REMEMBER THIS ONE BUT I KNOW WE LOST

2016: TRILLVEON TRILLIAMS JUKED A GUY OUT OF HIS SOCKS

2017: WE LOST BECAUSE IT WAS LATE AND JARRETT STIDHAM WAS IN THE MOOD TO MAKE US LOOK BAD WHICH IS UNDERSTANDABLE TO AN EXTENT

2018: LIKE I SAID. OUR DAMN TURN.

LAST WEEK WAS BAD. REALLY REALLY BAD. BUT YOU KNOW WHAT, LIFE GOES ON. NICK FITZGERALD IS OUT OF OUR LIVES FOREVER AND WE NEVER HAVE TO SEE HIM RUNNING DOWN THE DAMN FIELD UNTOUCHED OR THROWING THE BALL 90 YARDS ON THIRD AND 89 TO GET A TOUCHDOWN. IT’S OVER WITH.

NEW DAY. NEW DAWN.

AND I’LL TELL YOU WHAT, THIS TEAM BETTER DAMN WELL BE HUNGRY. THE RECEIVERS IN PARTICULAR. TOO MUCH DUBSTEP WITH THE DROPS (IS THAT A THING I DONT KNOW MAN WHATEVER). NO MORE DROPS. I HOPE WE’RE SITTING THERE DOING THAT THING WHERE TENNIS BALLS GET SHOT OUT AT LIKE 190 MPH AND THE RECEIVERS HAVE TO CATCH THEM WITH NO GLOVES.

AND THE CORNERS. MAYBE THIS IS DUMB BUT IM PRETTY DUMB. THIS IS THE GAME WHERE WE PUT IT ALL TOGETHER. THIS IS THE GAME WHERE OUR DEFENSIVE BACKFIELD SHUTS EVERYTHING DOWN. LIKE THAT ONE TIME IN REMEMBER THE TITANS WHERE THE DC WAS ALL LIKE “DONT LET THEM GET ANOTHER YARD” AFTER RYAN GOSLING GOT EXPOSED AS A DEFENSIVE BACK. RYAN GOSLING WONT START IN THIS DEFENSIVE BACKFIELD YALL, BECAUSE WE’RE GONNA BE LOCKED IN. -90 YARDS PASSING.

WE’RE GONNA WIN THIS GAME. YOU KNOW WHY? BECAUSE I AM CONFIDENT THAT THIS TEAM IS EMBARRASSED AND ANGRY. WE DIDNT PLAY UP TO OUR DAMN STANDARD LAST WEEK AND I KNOW, DEEP WITHIN MY HEART, THAT WE ARE GOING TO EXCEED THAT STANDARD THIS SATURDAY MORNING. F 11 AM GAMES MAN. THAT’S EMBARRASSING ENOUGH. WE’RE GONNA TAKE THAT TIMESLOT TO HEART AND GO OUT THERE AND BEAT THE PISS OUTTA THE TIGEREAGLES. MORE LIKE GUS MALZNAHN.

IM NOT SORRY FOR THAT.

KELLEN MOND IS GONNA THROW FOR 400

TRAYVEON AND JASHAUN SCOREBIN ARE GONNA COMBINE FOR ANOTHER 700

DAYLON MACK IS GONNA RUN A FUMBLE BACK IN TO THE ENDZONE AND SHOCK US ALL WITH HIS SPEED.

I WILL MAKE AT LEAST THREE REFERENCES TO IN MY FEELINGS BY DRAKE WHEN DESCRIBING THE WONDERFUL PLAY OF KINGSLEY KEKE

DEBIONE RENFRO WILL INTERCEPT 10 PASSES

OTARO ALAKA AND TYREL DODSON WILL BE LIKE THE BASH BROTHERS IN MIGHTY DUCKS AND ITS GONNA BE AWESOME.

WE’RE GONNA TEAR THAT FIELD UP YALL. WE’RE GONNA TEAR IT THE HELL UP. AND THEN AFTER WE WIN WE’RE GONNA CELEBRATE AND PAT OURSELVES ON THE BACK.

YOU KNOW WHY?

BECAUSE WE NEVER LOST FAITH IN OUR FIGHTIN TEXAS AGGIE FOOTBALL TEAM.

WE HAVE NEVER AND WILL NEVER LOSE FAITH.

LET’S TAKE THE GD FIGHT TO EM AGS.

THE TEXAS AGGIES ARE COMING YET AGAIN. AND HELL’S COMING WITH US

BEAT

THE

EVERLIVING

EVERLOVING

COMPOUND

COMPLEX

FIGHTIN TEXAS AGGIE THIS IS THE GAME THAT MADUBUIKE DOESNT RIP ANYONES HELMET OFF ALTHOUGH IT’S PRETTY BADASS WHEN HE DOES IT

FIGHTIN TEXAS AGGIE WE GET DONOTRILL WILSON PLAYING THE ENTIRE GAME FOR LIKE THE FIRST TIME IN 10 YEARS

FIGHTIN TEXAS AGGIE JACE STERNBERGER IS GONNA BE ONE STERN BURGER.

FIGHTIN TEXAS AGGIE HELL OUTTA

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