clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

Daily Bull 12.14.16 - Fightin' Texas Browns

New, 45 comments

Putting Aggie football seasons in perspective for over 50 years

NCAA Football: Southwest Classic-Arkansas vs Texas A&M Tim Heitman-USA TODAY Sports

The Cleveland Browns are very interested in Myles Garrett. Just about every mock draft has the Cleveland Browns taking Myles Garrett as the #1 overall draft pick in the 2017 NFL Draft. Myles Garrett has not officially declared for the 2017 NFL Draft (he is going to), but he probably will (he definitely will).

The Cleveland Browns are also winless in 2016, and are very likely to be the 1972 Miami Dolphins of shitty football as they eye a potential unwinfeated season. In fact, they haven't won a football game in one year and one day. Guess who was the last person to lead them to victory.

The Cleveland Browns are a terrible sports franchise. They haven't been to the playoffs since 2002 (they lost immediately). They haven't won their division since 1989 (Myles Garrett was decidedly not alive yet). They haven't won an NFL championship in over 50 years. They are one of four franchises that has never even attended a Super Bowl (two of the others - Houston and Jacksonville - are expansion teams, the third is the Detroit Lions).

In 1996 the Cleveland Browns were so hopelessly mired in football ennui that they ceased to exist. A lot of people forget that, but for 3 years there were no Cleveland Browns. The team as we knew it changed names and moved cities in the middle of the night like a family that had witnessed a horrible football atrocity for decades and needed to be relocated and protected. "I'm sorry, you must be mistaken. We're the Ravens. We've lived in Baltimore our whole lives." In the meantime the city of Cleveland razed their stadium to the ground, a pyre on which to burn the phoenix of their team and have it rise anew, ready to plumb new and fantastic depths of failure.

http://dailysnark.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/Screen-Shot-2016-03-25-at-10.43.23-PM.png

In the last 20 years alone the Cleveland Browns have wielded their first round draft pick like a toddler with a sniper rifle, using it to destroy the careers of college football players with precision if not accuracy. Tim Couch, Courtney Brown, Kellen Winslow II, Braylon Edwards, Brady Quinn, Trent Richardson, Barkevious Mingo, Johnny Manziel. All wildly talented in college. All sentenced to serve time in Cleveland before being released to a halfway house somewhere else in the NFL to hopefully salvage their careers.

Maybe Garrett will declare for the draft (he will). Maybe the Browns will finish with the worst record in the NFL this season (they will). Maybe they will use their first overall pick to take Garrett (they will). Maybe he will perform well despite the certainty of ineptitude surrounding him for a few years (he will).

Hopefully he will end up somewhere else where his talents will combine with others' and lead to great things (he will).