Fresh on the heels of the latest shocking news about the controversial quarterback to hit the Interwaves, fast food fish chain Long John Silver's has offered a lucrative endorsement deal to Johnny Manziel.
"We think the timing is perfect," said LJS spokesman Jim Hawkins. "We couldn't be happier, even though the cause for the connection is somewhat questionable."
That cause is a $25,000,000.00 sexual harassment lawsuit allegedly filed in Florida by pop culture expert Samantha Scacher. Part of the allegations reference the popular Robert Louis Stevenson novel and/or restaurant chain:
The restaurant, which has struggled of late, pounced on the opportunity for a big-name celeb endorsement. "We think he'd be a great fit to help promote our more healthy options, like the baked cod with sweet and zesty sauce, or fish tacos," said Hawkins. "Or who knows? Maybe a new menu option is in store for us."
Once the deal has been settled upon, commercial filming will begin on Brookpark Rd., the only Long John Silver's location in Cleveland.
Mike Leach was unavailable for comment at this time.
*UPDATE from Long John Silver's*
<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" lang="en"><p>Compliments to <a href="https://twitter.com/DrNorrisCamacho">@DrNorrisCamacho</a> for creativity: no endorsement signed with <a href="https://twitter.com/JManziel2">@JManziel2</a>, but he can stop in for a free fish sandwich anytime.</p>— Long John Silver's (@longjohnslvrs) <a href="https://twitter.com/longjohnslvrs/statuses/470605096796307456">May 25, 2014</a></blockquote>
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Thanks for playing along, guys.