Kyle Field: The House That Johnny Built?

Brent Zwerneman of the San Antonio Express-News reports that Texas A&M regent Jim Schwertner is batshit crazy wants to append "The House That Johnny Built" to the Kyle Field name. (Update: The phrase was also submitted as a trademark filing by JMAN2 Enterprises earlier this year. Story)

Schwertner, an apparently successful Texas Tech graduate, said, "Think about this – the last time we had a Heisman Trophy winner was John Kimbrough." Of course, Kimbrough never won the Heisman Trophy. John David Crow won in 1957, but since all of A&M's great players are named John, maybe Schwertner is onto something.

A livestock expert appointed to the Board of Regents by Rick Perry, Schwertner also referred to the 12th Man as "Aggie Nation" but stopped short of throwing a guns up while riding Reveille around on the MSC grass.

If the Board of Regents is dead set on renaming Kyle Field, we have some suggestions that we feel are more appropriate than "The House That Johnny Built":

• The House Where Bats Shat
• The House that Benjamin Knox Painted Next to a Giant Dog
• The House Dave South Called "That Place"
• The House of the 12th Man
• The House That the Guy Welding a Beam at the Top of the South Endzone Right Now in a Freaking Lightning Storm Built
• The House That Johnny Built for an Online Course

Here are other suggestions from Twitter:

@GBHunting "Kyle Field: The House That Started from the Bottom"

— clb2008 (@clb2008) May 12, 2014

Kyle Field: The House That Johnny Can't Wait to Leave... Whenever It May Be.

— Jon Lee (@therealjonlee) May 12, 2014

...and from McGibblets on TexAgs.com:

Kyle Field: The House That Jason Cook Beveled

Share your suggestions in the comments section below.