Texas A&M opts for 1989 throwback uniform

Texas A&M unveiled a 1939 throwback uniform for the Saturday, Nov. 1, game against Louisiana-Monroe. The uniform design honors the 75th anniversary of Texas A&M's 1939 national championship team. After receiving mixed feedback from internet users and their friends, Adidas and Texas A&M agreed to change course and will instead feature a 1989 throwback uniform on Saturday. This special, but hastily assembled uniform celebrates the 25th anniversary of R.C. Slocum's first season in Aggieland.

(This is not real and if you don't like the 1939 helmet we can't be friends.)

Signature features of the 1989 throwback uniform:

• The full facemask and neck roll provides ample head protection.
• An oversized mesh jersey in a half-shirt design provides increased range of motion, improved ventilation and prime viewing of washboard abs.
• Fingerless gloves provide all of the discomfort with none of the tactile advantage.
• A huge bath towel tucked into the pants sends a strong signal and helps gauge wind direction.
• A Rubik's cube, which the model just gave up trying to solve, is about to be stomped into oblivion.