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GBH Letters #2: Pepsi will not carry Coke-flavored Pepsi at Kyle Field

When I was a kid, I really enjoyed Paul Rosa's book Idiot Letters. Paul wrote ridiculous letters to corporations and published a hilarious book of their responses. We're doing something similar with an Aggie spin.

If you missed my first GBH Letter, I wrote to the Longhorn Network requesting an order form for VHS tapes of Fozzie's Safari Spectacular and Home Plate with Augie Garrido. Unfortunately, they were onto me and called us out on Twitter. This time I wrote a heartfelt letter to Pepsi requesting Coke-flavored Pepsi to be served at Kyle Field.

You can click here to read my letter and click here to read Pepsi's response. I've also copied the text of both letters below.

My letter to Pepsi

Dear Sultans of Soda Pop,

Howdy. I am a student at Texas A&M University in College Station, TX. After many years of being a "Coke" school, A&M entered a big contract with you guys at Pepsi. I think you’re a wonderful company and really appreciate the financial support. I was at the football game vs. Nebraska in 2011 when Pepsi provided free towels to all students. The photographs from that game are the most iconic ever taken of the 12th Man®™© at Kyle Field, and we have you to thank for that. If you missed the game, the students all threw the towels in the air to celebrate a close victory and they rained down onto the decks below. It was a beautiful sight. A real "Pepsi moment" for all Aggies in attendance. Husker fans probably hate you. Can you imagine losing a heart-wrenching game and then having some kid throw a Pepsi towel at you?

The main reason I am writing concerns the soda offerings at Kyle Field. I understand from my Horticulture Contract Law class that for your contract to work, only Pepsi products can be sold. I absolutely love Gatorade even though the Florida Gators are one of our S-E-X Conference rivals now. I am particularly fond of the off-green flavor. As a child, I tried some Crystal Pepsi that my father saved because he thought it might be worth money someday. He was SO MAD that I drank it, but it was really delicious and transparent. Did you realize people are selling 16 oz. bottles of Crystal Pepsi on eBay for over $60?!? My dad was right to make me smoke that carton of cigarettes as punishment.

Getting back to my main concern, I am hoping that you can provide a special formula to Kyle Field that tastes more like Coke. I think your product is good, but in Texas we call ALL SODA Coke because that is the flavor we like and are accustomed to. Dr Pepper would also be a good Pepsi flavor for us. I love your branding, packaging, and Beyonce but the formula is too sweet. Do you think if I try to drink many cans of Pepsi each day my taste buds will acclimate? Do you have any scientific findings on this? Can you tell me how to recreate Crystal Pepsi? Diluting your product in water DOES NOT achieve the intended effect. Please let me know what you think. Also, I’d really appreciate a t-shirt (XL) so I can help you advertise to the Generation Next.

Crystal Clearly,

G.B.Hunting

Pepsi's Response

Dear G. B.,

Thank you for taking the time to contact us at PepsiCo and for sharing your thoughts. We always enjoy hearing from a fan of our products and company!

Your description of the football game against Nebraska is certainly colorful; I imagine it was a sight to behold! It sounds like you are a die-hard fan.

The reason we offer a wide variety of beverages is to appeal to many different people. After all, different people have different tastes, and offering them a variety of beverages allows them to choose what they enjoy most! So although Pepsi may not be your flavor choice, there are certainly plenty of other flavors you would enjoy!

Thank you again for contacting us. I am enclosing a Pepsi shirt for you to enjoy. Good luck with the rest of your studies and Go Aggies!

Sincerely,

[name redacted]

Consumer Relations Representative

T-shirt received! Thanks, Pepsi.