Hey AJ congratulations! You and I apparently share the same birthday! I only know this because I happen to visit those "what celebrity shares your birthday!" sites out of some feeling that I am better by association to the mildest of coincidences. What I also realized is that, with your inclusion to my celebrity birthday list (which I'll assume came after the MNC last year) I have the worst birthday any human could have!
Let's celebrate our Birthdays together by reviewing what happened today:
If you didn't see it today, Rovell decided to continue his attack against A&M, which I thought to be his August Obsession. He apparently got another picture of Manziel signing autographs, which he decided to release the day before the Bama game.
Darren, in an attempt to ruin my birthday, you made yourself look like an ass hat. That is something very few can accomplish, so I congratulate you.
2. ESPN WTF
I'll assume that there is a shared staff between the ESPN graphics department and the Longhorn network. I mean, there has to be, right? That thing is leaking money faster than Facebook IPO. Apparently, what I will assume was some sip assistant pulling a stunt that he will never get adequate credit for, the Gameday logos for the Bama game didn't include our beveled awesomeness:
I mean, seriously, WTF? I assume that ESPN has absolutely no editors at this point. Even cuppy points out how poor my srelling is from time to time.
3. Juicy J
Juicy J is someone who's music I am intimately familiar with... NOT! (F.. I'm getting so old...) He is in College Station tonight.
College station tonite in tx— juicy j (@therealjuicyj) September 13, 2013
I think this is all that happened today. There's some rumors going around about New Jersey firebombing Syria, with Colorado on the way to provide water to put it out, but honestly, who cares about that stuff? Aggie football.
Lets also take a look at the elite company that share the day we both navigated the slip and slide of life:
- Niall Horan - Age 20 - Member of One Direction
Seriously. As if this Birthday couldn't be any worse, I have to share it with a One Direction member. I haven't listened to any of their music, but I have seen crap trending on twitter enough to piss me off. This is just a shame to anyone that shares my Virgo blood.
- Tyler Perry - Age 44 - I have no idea what this man does
Seriously, I have no idea what this guy does. I know he has been in some movies, but I am pretty sure he became famous via the greatest marketing ploy I have ever seen. Insert your name in front of 99 TV shows, and people will assume you are famous. Tyler Perry's House of Payne. Tyler Perry's I Can Do Bad All By Myself. Tyler Perry's Duck Dynasty.
It's insane. But whatever man. Somehow you got everyone to notice you. So congrats.
- Ben Savage - Age 33 - Boy Meets World
This might be the best actor we have. Unbelievable. Just another childhood actor whose IMDB credits go from "Starred in" to "Appeared in" in just a few short years. AJ, I just hope you'll have your boy meets world moment on Saturday when you throw another game losing pick.
- Richard Kiel - Age 74 - Acting roles that involved metal
74?? Really? Even that makes me feel old. If you don't know, Richard Kiel should obviously be at the top of this list. I mean he turned a starring role as a James Bond villain who could bite through a brick into one of the most beloved character roles of all time as a man with a nail in his head who stood up for Happy Gilmore. This one I am actually proud of. He was also a freaking disco legend:
I didn't believe that my shared celebrity birthday list could get any worse, but you did it AJ. I'm done. This birthday can't get any worse. I'm just going to go off for the night and enjoy my God given right to some Telco style (read uber nasty) birthday loving from my girlfriend.
As your elder, this is MY BIRTHDAY McCarron. Don't screw it up tomorrow by putting on any heroics. Let me thoroughly enjoy the fact that we occupied a portion of Nick Saban's brain for 9 months, and proved he can't do anything about it. I'm putting all of my confidence in the fact that men like Deshazor Everett and Julien Obioha will give you all of the birthday present that you can handle.
And Happy Birthday!