I'm tired of Tigers. I'm tired of them. And now we have to play these bastards from Mizzou. And quite frankly I have no strong feelings of hate towards Mizzou....well kind of not. Most of my anger towards them was taken out on the thrashing that we gave them last year, and after 2011/2010 man it felt good to BEAT THE ABSOLUTE SHIT OUT OF THEM.
So I'm not angry at Mizzou. I'm ALL CAPS FOR WHAT THEY REPRESENT. Redemption. Absolution. The opportunity to BE WHO WE ARE SUPPOSED TO GD MFING BE. Our QB should repeat as the Heisman winner. This season has lacked a signature win, and THIS IS OUR OPPORTUNITY TO DO JUST THAT INSERT SIGNATURE JOKE ABOUT JOHNNY MANZIEL HERE.
I'm at my parents house, and in addition to football, we're watching whatever movies are on TV. Right now "Taken" is on....and Johnny Manziel is Liam Neeson. Close your eyes and picture Johnny saying the following to Gary Pinkel
I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you.
[except Johnny doesnt have a daughter that we know of, but the rest apples]
BEGIN ALL CAPS.
WE ARE GOING TO WHIP THE SHIT OUT OF MIZZOU. WE ARE GOING TO TAKE OUT EVERY SINGLE BIT OF FRUSTRATION FROM ALL THE TIGER SHIT WE'VE TAKEN THIS YEAR OUT ON GARY PINKEL. PINKEL IS GOING TO NEED MORE WINE THAN IS AVAILABLE IN THE STATE OF MISSOURI TO EASE HIS PAIN FROM THIS GAME. THIS IS JOHNNY'S TIME. THIS IS MIKE'S TIME. THIS IS JAKE'S TIME. THIS IS BEN'S TIME. THIS IS OUR GODDAMN GAME AND WE ARE GOING TO EXACT OUR WILL.
Remember how terrible those 2010 and 2011 games felt? REMEMBER JOHNNY GOING DOWN WITH HIS KNEE LAST YEAR? REMEMBER JOHNNY RUNNING AROUND SHOOTING THE GIG'EM? CONFLICTING EMOTIONS. PUT THEM ALL TOGETHER AND USE THEM TO FUEL YOUR DRUNKEN RAGE.
THEME SONG OF THE DAY IS THE FOLLOWING: NOTORIOUS THUGS. JUST FOR THE FIRST LINE "ARMED AND DANGEROUS, AINT TOO MANY CAN BANG WITH US". AND MAYBE THE NEXT LINE "STRAIGHT UP WEED NO ANGEL DUST" BECAUSE 6 CARRIES LAST WEEK SOMEHOW STRIKES ME AS BEING ANGEL DUST FUELED AND WE DONT WANT THAT AGAIN.
BECAUSE THAT'S THE DAMN TRUTH. WHEN WE ARE ON OUR GAME, THERE AINT NOBODY WHO CAN BANG WITH US. AND THIS GAME IS WHEN WE ARE GOING TO BE ON.
ON THE DAMN ROAD
TERRIBLE UNIS BY ADIDAS
IT'S SO DAMN ON, MY FRIENDS. IT'S SO SO DAMN ON RIGHT NOW.
This week's countdown is for the seniors. BECAUSE THIS WIN IS FOR THE DAMN SENIORS.
1) BIG BEN BALLENA
I cant go through them individually because it would be too damn long and get to emotional AND NOT IN A GOOD WAY.
BUT THESE GUYS DESERVE THIS WIN. THEY ARE GOING TO GET THIS WIN. WE ARE GOING TO EXORCISE THE TIGER DEMONS BASED ON THESE GUYS TOMORROW. CLARENCE MCKINNEY IS GOING TO CALL THE GAME OF HIS LIFE. JOHNNY IS GOING TO PLAY THE GAME OF HIS LIFE. WE ARE GOING TO END THIS DAMN REGULAR SEASON ON A HIGH DAMN NOTE.
LET'S GO YALL. I KNOW WE'RE TIRED. I KNOW THIS SEASON HAS BEEN LONG. BUT NIGHT GAME. TOP 10 OPPONENT. SHITTY UNIFORMS. THIS IS THE STUFF LEGENDS ARE MADE OF. AND THIS GAME WILL BE LEGEN WAIT FOR IT DARY.
IT'S TIME YALL. IT'S THAT DAMN TIME.